Rory's Newborn Photo Shoot

When Rory was six days old she had her newborn photos done with Annette Goodman. Annette is my sister's mother-in-law and a very talented photographer. She was so patient with Rory and we could not have gotten better pictures to capture this sweet and special time. I highly recommend contacting her if you have a need for family photos!

Here are some of my favorites:

How sweet is that little face? I just want to cover her in kisses!

Rory, today you are three weeks old and your little personality is starting to really shine through. 

You still fit into newborn diapers and newborn clothes. 

You are so tiny and have the skinniest legs that are a little bow legged (just like your mommy)! 

You can cry if you really wanted to but you rarely let out a scream unless you have wicked painful gas. 

However, you make a lot of funny noises. I know it is time to feed you when I hear a sound I can best describe as grunting and you make this little sound until you have successfully latched on! 

When you are really hungry you peck our shoulders like a wood pecker.

I love hearing you giggle in your sleep (I wonder what you find so funny?)

You love to sleep. Sleeping through the night and almost sleeping through your feedings. 

Just like your brother, you are sleeping in your swing at night by mommy's side of the bed.

You like lying on your tummy, especially if Van is lying next to you. 

We can't get enough of all your big smiles.

Mommy is finally starting to feel better and we have gone back to nursing after the Lactation Consultant called yesterday to say that the meds I am taking are safe. I am excited that I was able to put on my jeans this morning and get them zipped up! It's not pretty because of my stomach but it's progress!

Little bean we are so happy you are here and we love you to the moon and back. You have added even more love and joy to our little life than we imagined. You are a blessing and we promise to take the best care of you. You are more loved than you will ever know. *hugs*

Life with two is.........

Let's be honest. Life with two is HARD. And so very sweet at the same time. It is the biggest blessing but it is also challenging. I knew it would not be easy but I guess I was not prepared for the ways in which it would challenge me.

Rory is a wonderful baby. She eats well, sleeps well and only truly gets fussy when she has gas. But, what baby doesn't? And Van is the best big brother. He loves to help Rory with her bottle, give her her paci, hang out with her when she is doing her tummy time, kiss her, hold her, and love on her. He wants her around all the time, even while he is playing with all his toys in his room.

So, I can't complain that my two minis are difficult. On the contrary, they are both so laid-back and easy going that besides life's necessities, they are a cake walk.

It's my body and my emotions that are being difficult and making life with two so challenging! We're almost to three weeks here and I've been to the doctor (for myself) three times already!!! Besides the normal and lovely post-partum stuff my body is going through, I woke up over the weekend with a UTI (probably TMI for some of you) and I found out yesterday that what the doctor thought was "allergies" on Sunday turned out to be Bronchitis on Tuesday! So, now I am on two different kinds of antibiotics (taking 4 pills a day), and a cough syrup with hydrocodone!

I have to pump and dump while I am on all these meds so what used to be a 30 minute process at most, has turned into an hour or more event. So instead of getting two hour increments of sleep at night, I am lucky to get one hour of rest! Just one more thing to challenge me. My mantra has become, "I can do this. I can do this." I can do this until Tuesday, I can do this until Tuesday (when I am done with all these drugs!) I really hate pumping........

And my emotions are running all over the place. Hormones are all out of whack and there are moments when I feel like I am about to burst into tears. Tears of love, tears of joy, tears of guilt (more on that later) and tears from feeling overwhelmed.

I was worried before Rory arrived about how I would share my love with her. I worried for not. Because I don't share love with her. My heart doubled in size to include room to love just her. Our house is literally bursting with love. I don't know what we ever did without her.

But I feel guilty for no longer being able to give Van my undivided attention. I am constantly holding Rory, feeding and changing Rory, burping Rory or just rocking her. And he is SO good. He doesn't get jealous or lash out at his baby sister. He does the opposite and tries to take care of her too. Sometimes I feel like I am being pulled into two different directions because a lot of my time is dedicated to taking care of Rory's immediate needs but I want to just sit and play with my little man too.

I am trying my best to do both at the same time. But it's kind of like cooking a big dinner for me. The kind of dinner where you have two to three pots going at the same time and every pot needs to be tended to at different times so they are finished altogether. I am terrible at doing this, I get so overwhelmed and Derek usually has to take over. I hope I am much better at being a mom to my minis than I am at cooking!

But enough about me and my issues.

These past three weeks have gone by in a blur. Thank you to all our family and friends who have brought us dinner or just come for a visit. We are so blessed that Rory is loved by all of you. Here are a few pictures to remember all the sweet moments. Get ready - there are A LOT!

Big Brother Van coming to visit Rory at the hospital

pool time at Nana's

cheese - ing for the camera

train ride to the library with Mimi & Papa

playing in the water table

flying Papa's plane

sweet cupcakes from Aunt Erin

brother/sissy bonding time

hanging out with fairy godmother Dalcha

love these leggings on my tiny dancer

bebe wearing

bath time fun

he is completely smitten

napping on mommy's chest

daddy's little hula girl

helping daddy do work

annah with an H (Hannah) visits

me hold my baby sister

Kate & Rory

mmmmm mac n cheese

all the cousins - Cole, Van, Rory & Mason

Uncle Clay and Rory meet

look at that cutie!

watching cartoons

Ellen is a natural

Uncle Scott always the first to meet our minis!

Papa loving on bean

Uncle Jerr Bear

Aunt Selwa

play time

daddy keeping it tight!

Rory's first boyfriend - Carter Harrell

Elizabeth wanted to go on the wagon ride too! Look closely and you can see Derek and Stew walking down the street pulling MB and Van!

Q couldn't believe how small she was!

Uncle Stew

Pizza Party (Van you know you loved all the attention. Caught you mid eye-roll!)

Getting our little GLO worm home

Rory's first morning with us went better than I had expected. We stayed a little longer in the labor and delivery room to let my epidural wear off and then we were transferred to the High Risk Post-Partum floor since all the other Post-Partum rooms were full. 

We had family and friends come visit us. I even got in a shower that morning! Uncle Josh brought Van in to meet his baby sister and the two hit it off almost right away. Van was actually a little shy and hid behind daddy before asking, "me hold MY Rory?"

love at first sight

someone is sleepy

That looks really uncomfortable! After seeing D try to nap on this chair I decided he needed to go home at night and sleep in a real bed. This also allowed Van to sleep in his bed so he didn't feel so out of sorts.

Angie & Luci came to meet Rory

Rory's God-father Uncle Jereme couldn't get enough of her

"Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true."

Van watching cartoons on one of his visits.

getting loved on by Uncle Josh

But that afternoon as Uncle Josh was holding our sweet baby girl, her nurse came in and said Rory's doctor needed her to go back to the nursery. She came in later to tell me that Rory had Hemolytic Disease of the Newborn or ABO Incompatibility which means my blood type (O+) and Rory's blood type (A+) were incompatible and my immune system had produced antibodies that were attacking Rory's red blood cells. This had caused her to become very jaundiced and would require phototherapy treatment until my antibodies had been cleared from her body. 

Rory was placed under dual phototherapy lights immediately and I would only get to see her for 30-40 minutes every 3 hours so that I could nurse her. The hardest part of all this for me was not getting to hold my little bean. I knew I needed to do what was best to get her healthy so she could come home with us but I longed to hold her in my arms and watch her sleep. 

Visiting my little GLO worm (the nurses nicknamed her this)

getting a sun tan with her sun shades on

I felt terrible that she spent hours in there all alone with no one holding her. Even looking at this picture makes me tear up.

The nurses did a blood test every 12 hours to keep a watch on her bilirubin levels and at every blood test her levels would rise. So her doctor recommend she wear a bili-blanket anytime the nurses took her out from under the lamps. This earned her the endearing nickname - little GLO worm. 

Being under the phototherapy lights all day and night made Rory so tired that often times when they brought her to me to nurse, she wouldn't wake up to eat. I did everything I could think of to wake her and sometimes my tickling would work but she wasn't getting enough milk and by day two she had lost 11% of her birth weight. So I had to start pumping after every feeding and her doctor asked that she be supplemented with a formula bottle while she was under the lamps. 

Like I said before, I wanted to do what was best for Rory but this upset me because I felt so helpless. I couldn't even give my child the nutrients she needed to have energy to get better. Instead it felt like me nursing her was doing the opposite, making her expend all her energy nursing and not getting anything in return. 

This was not how I thought my hospital stay would go at all. But I knew we were both in great and capable hands and everyone was doing what was best for our baby girl. I prayed every night and day that her levels would stop rising so we could go home and be a family. Not only did I not get to hold Rory but I only saw Van for maybe 30 minutes a couple times a day. I missed my little man too. 

My mom spent the night with me on my last night in the hospital. It was so nice to have some company, someone to talk to and someone to help me keep Rory awake while nursing her. Derek always looked so sad when he left me at night but Van really needed one of us to be home with him. 

Mom, thank you for staying with me, for trying to sleep in that uncomfortable chair bust most importantly thank you for just being there. You are the best mom ever and I love you more than words can describe. 

Our prayers were answered on that fourth day when her bilirubin level stabilized and she went from an 11% weight loss to an 8% weight loss! Thank you to everyone who prayed along with us and kept us in their thoughts. I knew this wasn't a serious condition and Rory was going to be more than fine after her treatment but the separation was hard on this emotional mama and I am so grateful for all the love we received from our family and friends. Because everything was looking up, Rory was taken out from under the lamps but we couldn't be discharged until after they did one more blood test to make sure her levels didn't start to go back up. 

It was a wonderful day of lying around with our little GLO worm and just staring at her. 

playing dress-up already. the bow is bigger than her head!

Nana bought Rory her own GLO worm to keep her company while she was in the nursery. 

At 5 pm, we received our discharge papers and we started packing to go home! Thank you, thank you, thank you! I knew God was with us the whole time. I felt his presence in all the nurses, doctors and lactation consultants we saw. I heard his words in all the texts, emails and voices of our family and friends. So again, thank you to everyone who knew exactly what to say or do that made us feel so very loved and supported.